If you are reeling from a recent change or making a more planful change, the following tips will help you find your way through the unknowns of this experience:
- Consider your outlook and perspective. Can you reframe your situation, so you can see the possibilities and opportunities?
- Let go and learn to tolerate “not knowing”.
- Find a balance between introspection and action. Going “inward” helps you rediscover your strengths and values and often reminds you of past changes you’ve managed successfully. Taking action gets you moving and begins the process of creating a new structure when a change happens.
- Seek personal and professional support as needed. Know who you can turn to or lean on.
- Cultivate flexibility and resiliency!
To read more about resiliency, check out this website:
These tips are based on resiliency studies. Look forward to “bouncing forward”!
The unknown yawns like an abyss when you “get” that something’s over (i.e. your job’s ended…your relationship is done,etc). Years ago on a team’s course, I waited my turn to fall backwards off a three foot high log into the arms of 6-8 of my other team members. I was sweaty palmed…my mouth was dry and I struggled mightily to quiet the disaster scenarios running through my head. “Just let go”, one of my team members said! “Yes! No! I can do this! No I can’t!” In the end I did let go, experiencing the free fall that comes with this trust activity, landing safely in my team member’s arms!
The unknown asks us to let go…to trust!
Change invites a journey! The journey begins with an ending because you can no longer hang out as the “stay at home” mom (your last child has gone off to school…or pretend you have a routine, when you no longer go to work (fired or retired) or hope you’ll hear your mother’s voice on the other end of the phone when you absent-mindedy ring her up, only to remember you laid her to rest a month ago.
You begin the journey to the new you
…because the role you played is gone, and thus, the routine
…because the disadvantages of trying to maintain that role or routine outweigh the advantages
…because you start to get glimpses of a new way of knowing yourself.
Because there is an ending!
On a daily basis we’re asked to find our way…to a meeting…to a performance …Sometimes we’re familiar with the “way”, but other times, when we are between identities, we may have to stop, and orient ourselves before proceeding…